Oh Momma Please Spare!

In a world of cut throat competitions the new age momma fusses at the slightest deviation of the child’s performance. She is always fretting over marks lost, portions, homework, extra curricular activities or even competitions. Performance oriented goals is what she sets for her child and she accepts nothing less than an “Outstanding”. 

Overtly anxious from the time she conceives she reads and researches to find out what she should eat, read, listen and do to stimulate the intellect of her baby in the womb. As soon as the child is born she starts reading books on milestones and meticulously monitors them. In the mean time she buys educational CD’s, picture books and age appropriate toys to encourage visual learning and aid motor skills development. By the time the toddler is two years she would have researched on Google, read reviews, consulted other moms and decided on the best play school. They then set time tables for the kids, pre program playtime and then enroll them to classes like whiz kid, phonics, handwriting, clay crafting, speaking skills, social skills and many unheard of skills.

As the child attends playschool she becomes consumed getting school admissions nightmares of gaining a place at the school of dreams. She tours, collects applications and attends parent interviews at every school. Once child is in school to ensure the child has an upper edge she arrives at all PTA’s, enrolls the child to all extra programs in school, reads about nutritious meals and  a make well balanced diet chart, micro monitors each and every activity of the child. She wants her child to stand out in the rat race and be an achiever. It’s no surprise that she becomes fearfully competitive and desperately pushes her child to be the best of the lot.

As the darling child moves to higher grades, the momma ordeal becomes more and more tough, she employs tutors in all subjects, ensure the no minute is wasted and no marks are lost. Without a bat of an eyelid she effortlessly toils dropping and picking the child from various tuition centers. Just when you think all this is almost coming to a welcome end, she discovers how shatteringly cutthroat gaining a place in a college of the dreams is. She again horns her knowledge about all the competitive exams like the IITS, AIEE, PMPTs etc and ensure the child has a good “coaching center” which gruels her child. She knows the portions of her child including which chapter is on which page (believe me I have been a witness to this) and sits through all the time the child studies. At this stage the momma’s child will be so exasperated that he/ she will put in the most of the effort to escape from their momma’s prison, the child will decide the best way is to slog for two years and clear the exams and escape to the hostel!

Many of these moms have given up their careers and live their dream through their children. In the desperate race to give her child the best possible start, she would have forgotten how important it is that the child has to succeed, through their own ambition, not hers. Momma’s always mean well for their child but please momma dear spare the child and enjoy the other euphoric pleasures of motherhood. Stop only keeping  focus on the glittering academic star that shines far away. Achieving it is not the only goal you set for your child “Momma come on, get a life and give one to your child too”.